life.

Sometimes... I wonder.. What am I doing with my life. I love where I am at... I think I am in a good position. I just wish I had someone to share it with. I can't help but feeling really lonely lately.

Ever since I got in my car accident..Yes I am fine.. I have found that not many people talk to me anymore. It makes me really heart broken and make my trust issues even worse.

Were they only using me for my car and to get around?

Well forget them then. After having lunch with my dear friend Nate today. I realized who my true friends are and who I really care about.

On another note... I really miss him!!! Ugh.. And I don't know if I can go to his graduation now.. Fingers Crossed. I really hope that it works out. It will be a much needed vacation. And I will be going with my Sister/Best friend. She plays both roles :) ever since I moved out we haven't been hanging out as much :( So we have a lot of catching up to do. Only 15 Days until I can actually see him and talk to him face to face. Not over a letter!! I can't even explain to you what him being gone has made me realize. I absolutely love him to death! He is one of the only people that knows everything about me and we are still the best of friends. I am really feeling like I need him right now! That is a fact of life! :/ I just don't know what to do about this certain situation... Should I pursue what I think I might want... Or should I keep a bond that is falling apart anyways. Ugh so confusing. Buuuttt I realized something. So this girl at work the other day(heaven forbid.. I might kill her. Real obnoxious she is) asks me..." So if he were to show up right now and ask you to marry him would you?!) my response... I don't really know.. I love him to death. That is no question. And I would love if things magically worked out with us.. But I don't know if it is meant to be. I just wish I was with who I was going to marry so I could stop going through all the capitol D-I-C-Ks coughcough BRADcough cough.. haha that is a story for a different time. 

Oh yeah... I moved out and live with Tiffany now. It is fantastic. I love the freedom I have here.. Yet still being with a family makes if feel more like a home. I love that my best friend is a 3 year old.. (tomorrow! Yikes!!) and I love talking to Tiff about anything and everything  because I know she is not going to judge me and she has been through a lot so she knows the best advice :) I am so Thankful for my relationship with her!

But dear Christmas time... You are supposed to have snow that comes along with your jolly spirit... I guess you forgot that this year... Along with a boy to cuddle up with during this frigid time... hmmm.. maybe sooner or later you will get it right :) hopefully sooner?






Sorry... I know lots of random things in there. I just have a lot on my mind tonight and have the slight urge to cry. Not so sure why. FML. I want someone to come play. Any takers?



xoxo-Jordynlynn

I wish everyone would realize this and get over petty issues :)